Thursday, March 3, 2011

Thanks much?

As kids, we are brought up to be polite, say please, thank you, etc. I still remember getting presents that I didn't even want or ask for, yet I rolled my eyes and dragged out the 'THANK YOU' because that is what we were taught to do.
In the past week, I've been fortunate enough to be in a position to 'help out with shidduchim' and be a sorta 'makeshift Shadchan' for some singles. Whilst I sat with papers, profiles, computer databases and sorted through the 'creme de la creme' as the French say and did all the follow up work, I did not ONCE, get a decent 'thanks'.
Do I necessarily need the thank you? nopes.
Is it common courtesy? yes
Does it make you feel appreciated and want to help out more? double yes
which is why I totally get why my parents brought us up to thank people.
a. It tells them we care and feel we appreciate what they have done for us (even, if in shidduchim all it means is a thought, or a phonecall)
b. It makes them feel that they did something for someone else and the thank you makes them feel good enough to want to do it more.

So, not only did the people I helped out NOT even say thanks-they criticized my choices and were very rude-which is even worse than a non-thank you in the first place.
Will that stop me from helping others? no sir-ree, I will not let some rude, ungrateful people stop me, in fact I want to prove (to myself?) that there are lotsa other nice people out there and continue on my same mission.
But just remember-a small little thank you, goes a long LONG way!


  1. I'm finding this funny, considering how just a few posts ago you were on the other side, being suggested guys who weren't for you. I'm sure, even then, you were perfectly polite and courteous, even when the guys were a "hell to the no."

    The thing is, you know the frustrations of the single gal. While of course they should have been more considerate and grateful, you've been there. You can commiserate.

  2. Data-of COURSE I was courteous when the guys were a TOTAL H-E-Double Hockey STicks NO!
    I can totally commiserate, but at the same time-even when I get 'redd' the WORST suggestions ever, there is still a small side of appreciation.