Monday, August 26, 2013

Excuses, excuses...

Hi all! So I'm back from summer vaca and had a week full of Simchas B"H. Which means that a whole lotta people that I haven't see in ages (or since before my vaca) decided to make me their personal Chesed project.
Yes folks, while I was getting dressed to go to weddings and worrying about frizz and flyaways as well a staticky skirts, other yentas were checking me out 'oy the older single at the young girl's wedding' and trying to find me ANY guy as long as he's jewish and wearing a pair of pants. 
Of course from all the backrubs, IY"H by yous, winks and pity smiles, not to mention the people who cornered me to ask me if I'm busy and the others who asked me to email my résumé, NOTHING came out of all the gestures/comments. 
Now I'm not chas v'shalom trying to blame it on these caring people but if a guy says no or is not interested to begin with-just say so-I can take it and I don't mind but just Don't make excuses!
seriously it was going from bad to worse and even more. I've never heard of such stupid and non-sensical ones, so I gotta give someone credit for being creative but c'mon guys: stop with the excuses. Say it like it is so us girls can move on without false hope and as normal girls can. 

Monday, August 12, 2013

Lesson in Elul

Here's a lesson I learned the hardway, and perhaps the reason for this (amongst others) is to publicize it and avoid future errors.
It happens all too many times-you say something about someone-and then it all goes wrong. Either it somehow gets back to that person, or the person you're saying it to is friends with/related to the person. Someone takes it the wrong way. Basically SOMEONE will end up getting hurt. Even if that's not what you intended to do.
The way it happened with me was, I was talking to a group of people. Someone brought up the topic of shidduchim (duh! it's like the only way people who don't know me, feel they can have a conversation with me) and I was talking about one of my dating experiences. "I once went out with this guy, he was sooo not mentchlechdik.....he didn't even take me home.....he dumped me at the curb...he was rude..I had to pay....etc" I was half-laughing whilst telling the story, as in retrospect, it was indeed an insanely funny dating story-I personally would've never believed it if I didn't actually experience it myself.
Lo & behold, one of the people in the group turned white and got quiet. I don't know if they heard the story from the actual guy, or if they just KNEW who it was, but mumbled something about him being an 'ok' guy and walked away.
ya-so now I gotta be careful about what I say, how I say it, who I say it to, and to basically keep in mind that whatever comes out of my mouth may be taken literally & may get back to the person I'm speaking about....
Maybe I'll just stick to blogging for now..