Sunday, December 26, 2010

when Too Much Info is not good

Since this whole 'Shidduch Resume' thing came into being, a couple of years ago, we all had to succumb and get ourselves a nicely written resume. So we learned the tips of Microsoft Word and put in all information which we thought was pertinent to know.
Then, came the photo to be included
Then, shortly afterwards, came the commentary.
I, personally, have been on the receiving end of many a critique from shadchanim, friends, family, etc.
Some Shadchanim have complimented me, telling me that even though they never actually 'met' me before, they really feel they know me, based on my resume and what was written and, I guess, how it was written.
Some have told me to leave out certain points.
Others have told me to include certain points.
Add more references, take out references, as there were too many, etc.
The list goes on and on and on.

So, these days when people ask me to email/fax them my resume as they might have someone in mind, I send it and tell them: 'this is my resume. I'm sending it to you the same way I send it out to anyone. It's written by me and describes me pretty well-I think, as I'm the one who wrote it. There are no secrets, no 'hidden clauses', and I think I pretty much put myself out there in one page or less. However, if you don't like it-feel free to do whatever you wish with it; cut, copy and paste, I don't care, if it makes you happy. I'm happy with my resume and I'm sending it to you as is.'

Last week I got a call from a Shadchan complaining. She said that the last few times she sent out my resume (to a boy's mom, I'm assuming), she received complaints that there was TOO much info. Who woulda ever thought the more info, the worse off? I mean we're talking about BLIND DATING HERE PEOPLE! How else would you find out more about someone?! But she said that I should cut out all the stuff and just put in basic info, as if I"m filling out an application.

so, to make the world happy (and for those of you out there who always say this 'to do my Hishtadlus', I will scrap away all the details and leave my basics for this Shadchan..


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