Sunday, December 12, 2010


Lately, I feel like any Shidduch that gets 'redd', comes with a set few preconditions.
It goes something to the tune of this:
Shadchan calls up: 'guess what Mrs. ___, I have a shidduch for your daughter and I already gave her resume to the boy's mother/family/himself and they checked into her and everything seems ok. The only thing is, they would like to know if ____, and if you agree to that, only then will he give an ok to go out with her'
or it can go something like this: 'Hi Mrs. ____, I have a shidduch for your daughter, the boy's mother/family/himself already checked into her and got great information but before they go ahead and give a yes, they first want to know
a) How much you are willing to pay for wedding & future living costs?
b) If your daughter will travel there-he is absolutely, b'shum oifen not gonna travel for her
c) If you can send a photo-he will not give a 'yes' without first seeing a photo for him to decide if he is attracted to her
d) She is willing to give up TV/Movies/listening to non-Jewish music/wearing jeans, etc.
e) she is willing to move to Israel/Lakewood/random far out city in middle of nowhere - so he can intern there and receive his professional degree, as that's the program he got into and it's really in middle of nowhere.

Now, while some of these options may sound reasonable, we also got alot (if not the above mentioned) that were, excuse my language: INSANE! So, before we even go ahead and look into things for ourselves, before we agree to even hear a boy's name, we havta agree to all these pre-conditions, e.g. go into the relationship promising things without even KNOWING the guy, let alone his name!!!

What has this world come to?! (and I thought prenups were a bit too much, huh?)

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