Monday, October 5, 2009

Keeping Up Appearances

So here I am yet again at the pc. First days are over and now there's a mere few days break until the 'Second Days' of Yom Tov and I feel the need to rant, so I'm gonna let off steam where it's safe and where it won't 'ruin my shidduch prospects', so here goes.

I don't know how it works for guys, but with girls, we truly care about our appearances, especially when we know we're 'on show' for all those 'boy's mothers / shadchans / spies / references, etc'. I'm the type of girl who enjoys my showers each night, puts on makeup everyday, likes dressing up, etc. As my neighbor kindly put it, 'you're the only girl I know who plays basketball in a jean skirt and a full face of makeup!'

So now, here comes Yom Tov, which means ONE shower for 2.5 (half of friday duh!) days, makeup once to last you the 2.5 days and hair that if you're lucky lasts 3 hours. To add to all this, the forecasted rain, rain, and 40% chance of rain over Yom Tov. If you're lucky enough to NOT have rain, then there was humidity, and if not that, than seriously consider yourself lucky!

I think I did fairly well Friday night, my hair was great-if I may say so myself, and my makeup was spectacular.

Then came Shabbos morning. OK, to judge, it was like every shabbos morning, just 'ok', you know, half 'au naturel' and the rest whatever remained from the makeup.

Not to mention those long, heavy meals and for dessert, my mom's most awesome Hersheys Chocolate Cake (and with pareve chocolate). So by the time Sunday came around, I was I gained 2 lbs more (so much for that cute, frilly, fitted black dress), I had total bedhead (and i didn't even sleep THAT well) and whatever makeup wasn't on my pillow left my eyelashes stuck together! Ya, so you can imagine how well I looked which did lotsa for my ego on 2nd day Yom Tov.

Then I remember hearing my seminary teacher saying, 'if you have oily hair and go to shul with your hair on 2nd day Yom Tov, it's a badge of honor that you still go to Shul to daven and not worry about your looks' and I'm thinking, dude, there is NO way I will face the entire community looking the way I am without the oily hair! I have soo much to uphold here. Talk about keeping up appearances!

I sat infront of my mirror and just imagined walking down the street-oh wait! Murphy's law came into play 2nd day Yom Tov=the rainclouds went away and it was a beautiful sunny day! anyhoo, so ya, back to me walking down the street looking like one of the singers from KISS (streaked black eyeliner/mascara), bedhead and 'plotzing' in my straight skirt, with a jacket to cover the fact that i gained those extra few pounds, and watching all those gimme me the 'elevator stair' (starts with the shoes and slowly makes the way up to my head, slowly registering each aspect of my attire and body) and then the face of approval, or in this case 'disapproval' for the potential guy they had in mind.
Conclusion: I stayed in my cozy pjs and comfy slippers under the covers reading some good chicklits (after I davened at home, of course) and this way I can still keep up appearances in time for Second Days.
Good Moed to you all!

1 comment:

  1. Now don't laugh: corn starch. Otherwise known as dry shampoo. I spent $8 on some fancy bottle, but I find the cornstarch works just as well. Dust some into your roots the night before (to ensure no lingering granny locks), and your hair should be light and airy in the morning.

    Next: Tarte 4 day lash stain. It is bulletproof. Baby oil will take it off after yuntif, but for two days, your eyes will be good to go.

    Poundage: control top stockings in a size too small. Breathing is completely overrated anyway.