Sunday, December 1, 2013


Dontcha just love it, when Shadchanim you meet/speak to tell you that they are so busy making shadchanim and doing 'other things', so you should feel free to keep 'reminding' them about you?
Usually, when I'm told this, I lose hope in the Shadchan who tells me, I mean obviously if they seem to mention it to me-it means they are either forgetful, or have their hands full, or don't have anything for me at all.
BUT, my new thing has been the following. Let's say someone calls/emails/texts me to send my information. Before doing so, I first ask if it's for a specific person, and if so, who that specific person is (that way, in case it was suggested before OR we went out and it was TOTALLY not shayach I'm saving the shadchan, the guy, and myself a whole saga of 'headache'). Next, I forward my information and wait a week. I try and remember about a week later and if/when I don't hear back, I send a gentle 'reminder'. Then I wait to hear back and each week, I will continue to 'remind' them until I get back a YES or NO, or whatever excuse they have for not getting back to me.
But, there are the other reminders-the reminders to the shadchanim who made these 'promises' to set you up, and getting working on a few ideas they had in mind whilst meeting/speaking to you and NEVER got back to you. I send them reminders every so often-let's say, before yom tov or every few months. Of course, those are also the shadchanim who won't even send back a one-liner saying 'sorry, I don't have anyone' or 'you are on my mind', etc. No. They ask you to send emails/texts but don't even hit the 'reply' button=I just don't get why.
Can anyone enlighten me?


  1. Story of my life:
    "Send me your info, I may have a few people for you."
    And never heard back again for months...or ever.

  2. Miss Shidduch Scene should forget about shadchanim and use THIS BLOG to get married. How?

    This blog should include all this information about Miss Shidduch Scene: her real name, city of residence, her real year of birth, accurate height, occupation, background and email address. It should also include two very recent pictures: a close up of her face, and a second picture showing her standing, taken from a distance of 5 to 6 feet.

    The goal: for Jewish single men to contact Miss Shidduch Scene, by email, with no participation from shadchanim or any other undesirable third parties.

    I suggest that Miss Shidduch Scene should not attempt to describe what kind of man she is looking for, nor should she present a list of requirements. Instead, she should consider every unmarried Jewish man who contacts her, even if he seems different from what she was expecting.

    And say Tehillim.

  3. WM: couldn't agree with u more. As per ur last line tho, I would say "EVER".
    Mr. Cohen: ur post is a bit stalkerish. If anyone is interested in me based on my blog, they r free to contact me as they please. But to ask me to publish all my personal details (as u say: full name, date of birth, city, etc) and in addition to post 2 photos: one close up and one full length?! Who do u think u r? And then after asking me to publicize everything about me on this forum without me describing any tiny details of remotely what type of guy I'm lookin for and to consider "any" guy. I mean, if u've read this blog surely u must know that I definitely ain't the kinda girl whose gonna "choose random guys based on the fact that they sent in info". Ur asking me-someone u don't really know-to put myself out there and be vulnerable but then consider EVERYONe?!?

    1. Lol, sounds about right...I'm currently being stalked by a Shadchin who wants hourly updates, and will call/email to check up on it, to see how things are going.
      Seriously...Back off.

      And as for Mr. are people still only starting to realize his posts are a bit stalkerish...

  4. WM: agreed. Also I've been trying to 'ignore' Mr. Cohen's comments up until now but this time , his comment was just too *extreme*