Friday, May 20, 2011

When 'non-tznius' happens on a Date

This is second hand info:

My friend's sister is seriously dating someone. She must be about 22, and I wouldn't say she is yeshivish, but she is more frum than her family. She wears her skirts like exactly at the 4-inch mark, probably doesn't watch tv/movies, goes to shiurim and is the type to daven mincha everyday, just to give you all a picture. Her family is more open-minded and are slowly moving to the right by taking small things upon themselves and slowly changing the style of clothing and adding from frum-terminology to their lingo.

Anyhoo, so she's dating this really yeshivish guy-family of rosh yeshiva-type. They're on a date and they go for dessert. Apparently, the 'minhag' at the dessert place is that they ask you you're birthday and hand you a small paper with your horoscope-a one liner phrase.

So they both get handed their mini-papers with their one-liners and as a cute thing, they take each others and read it out loud. The guy reads the girls, it's something typically stupid. The girl refuses to read his outloud. She starts blushing and is clearly embarassed. The guy asks her to read it again and is so curiuos to know why she won't read it. She finally acquiesces and tells me, she cannot read it but will let him see it to read to himself.

It says something clearly not-tznius. Not like serious pritzus, but let's just say it includes an act that only married couples do.

So, yes, this young couple are basically ready to get married. They are dating seriously and may even get engaged to each other, meaning, hopefully by now they've matured in life, realize that they get along well, and may end up living with each other, so one little 3-letter-word, no matter how untznius, shouldn't really get in the way that much.

Apparently, they just got engaged, so it didn't make that much of a difference, but c'mon folks-I believe that in this stage in life, we're all (hopefully!) over 18 and anything rated R is either something we heard on the street/bus/subway or seen on billboards/tv/internet/movies. No one can be that naive in this day and age, and aside from that, what do they think marriage is about? do they think storks still deliver the babies? My opinion on the matter-grow up, don't make a bigger deal about it. OK, lemme also consider how, when I was at that age, a good Bais Yaakov girl, I would too -be embarrassed to read the word outloud and this girl is MUCH frummer, so I really can't judge, but I guess, being at my age, when I've dated so many (may I add 'not shy-at-all!') guys, I think I've heard and seen it all. Perhaps, I would blush and then briefly change the subject, but sheesh! it's just a one-liner typed up but some random dude who gets paid to copy and paste horoscopes onto paper!


  1. It's probably something they could have laughed about.... how far along were they in the dating process?
    anyhow, those things are stupid in the first place...

  2. Sounds like her family is not well grounded if they are slowly moving to the right.

    And, do you know what the 3-letter-word was? If yes, you are as discussion-worthy as your subjects because you didn't write it in the post.