A friend of mine called to 'redd' me a shidduch. Yay! This week has been quite busy with phone calls about shidduch ideas being 'redd' to me, so let's hope they actually get past the guy and he actually makes some calls before deciding that I'm too far away and he's not interested in an 'out-of-town' girl.
In any case, so my friend is getting my info (sad, what shidduchim has come to=even my friends need an emailed resume, PDF, Black & White, with minimum 4 references & preferably a photo, if not two) and when I'm done with my speech, and she's done taking my info, she asks me if I wanna know about the guy.
Honestly, my curiosity got the better of me, but I was chilled and told her, only if she wanted. So she tells me she doesn't really remember his name, but he's from Flatbush, he's like whatever age and he's a lawyer. That's all. Then she waits for my approval, but honestly, she still didn't tell me ABOUT THE ACTUAL GUY. So I told her I haven't heard the name before (she did recall his name later on, but wasn't sure about the first name) so it wasn't redd and I really didn't need more info unless the guy says yes.
Then she tells me, ..and here I quote 'he's an A-M-A-Z-I-N-G, A-M-A-Z-I-N-G, MOST PHENOMENAL guy....I mean, I haven't actually met him or his family, but I know his relatives and they're the nicest, sweeetest people, etc.'
Hello?!?! Hopefully no one sums my up based on my relatives as (a) I'm NOTHIN like them at ALL, (b) I should hope the person actually met me and (c) can confirm that based on what they know about me-that I'm a potential shidduch idea for someone else, based on the other person who they know, or heard about, etc.
So what people actually KNOW, or say they KNOW are 2 diff. things. Don't paint a whole beautiful picture, with all the descriptive adjectives=unless it's firsthand. Otherwise, all guys are nice, sweet, goodlooking, great middos, etc. I'm not buying what people just say-they havta KNOW
I don't even trust those who know. In the end, the only way to get a real picture of a person is by going out with them. I have gone out with people's cousins, nephews, sons, whatever, all sold as out-of-this-world and, on a certain level, they certainly are.
ReplyDeleteI want to make my own conclusions, not date someone based on someone else's perception.