Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Deceiving Date Descriptions

Ever feel frustrated with shidduch calls?
Now, don'tcha feel even more frustrated with making the calls and getting weird info, or info that doesn't match, or people saying different things all together-especially when these people are the 'chosen references' listed on a resume?
So, lately my friend, Huvi has been on the burnt end of the above situation. The last few boys she was suggested to all ended up being total losers and if half the information she received even matched up to the boys she dated-she would've never agreed to even date them, but obviously at this point it is too late and so more damage has been done in the dating department.
After listening to her horror stories and hearing how deceiving the info was and how some people had carefully worded their descriptions or managed to answer a question without answering the question directly, or how they skipped out the 'minor' details which they felt was minor, but which was obviously a major factor.
So, in order for all of you to avoid having horrible experiences, the lesson learned from Huvi's detrimental dating descriptions is the following.
-BE SPECIFIC in your questions
-Make sure the people you call answer the specific questions you ask
-Call atleast THREE people and ensure all the info you ask matches up to each other as well as the info received (resume)
-If you can call your own references, that is preferable
-Any worries or concerns should be directed to the Shadchan
-Body language/tone of voice and sometimes reluctance may say more than actual words
-READ BETWEEN THE LINES

good luck and hoping none of you have any surprises or spoilers on your next date!

1 comment:

  1. I find that there is no point to references. The ones listed are programmed to say nice stuff, even to invent stuff.

    I can't prevent jerky dates. All I can do is go out and find out for myself.

    ReplyDelete